Haiku Friday

{The winners of my hat giveaway were Patty and Sonya who both requested newsboy hats! I have emailed to let them know they won. If you didn’t win, remember to visit my shop and enter the code GIVEAWAY for 20% off.}

Three day weekend here
So looking forward to it
Rest, play, work, play, rest
Headed to The Nard
Gonna road trip with Joey
Hanging with old friends
Sunday and Monday
Lots of projects to work on
Time with the fam.


Some things to consider this summer.

Living in SoCal, I see a lot of summer behavior throughout the year. But when actual summer rolls around, there are special things people do that make me roll my eyes even more than normal.

  1. Put your bra straps away.  Unless you are Gwen Stephani circa 1994 or participating in the Avon Walk for Breast Cancer (where bras are often worn on the outside of clothes), keep those straps UNDER your clothes. There is a reason they make bras in 892 configurations. Embrace it.
  2. Give your feet a little love.  Summer is the season of exposed flesh and probably none more than feet.  No one wants to look at your nasty overgrown toenails and cracked heels.  Gross. If you can’t afford a professional pedicure, at least trim your nails, slap some lotion on your feet a couple times a day, and run a loofah across your heels now and then.  It will make such a difference.  And I won’t have to gag when I’m sitting next to your nasty feet in a meeting.
  3. Shorts and dresses should cover your ass. It doesn’t matter how rockin’ your body is, this is just dumb.  Why bother putting on any clothes at all?  Just go naked. That will save people the trouble of trying to figure out if your dress was meant to be a shirt or whether you are, in fact, wearing anything on the bottom.
  4. Go easy on the lighter fluid. I can usually tell that summer is coming by the increased scent of lighter fluid in the air.  Barbecue smell is wonderful.  Lighter fluid makes me gag.  You don’t need to use the entire pint of it, a little bit should be sufficient.  Or better yet, get one of those can things to heat up your coals and skip the air pollution.
  5. Think about staying home one weekend. I don’t know about where you live, but where I live the traffic gets insane on the weekends between Memorial Day and Labor Day.  I can’t even go the 20 miles to my parents’ house without having to sit in an hour of traffic on a Sunday afternoon.  Besides, gas prices are insane.  Stay home.
  6. Use a napkin.  People develop this annoying habit in the summer of letting their food dribble down their faces.  It’s like everyone suddenly thinks they’re in a watermelon commercial.  I don’t get it.  Use a fork. Or a napkin. Or your shirt. Just get that drippy stuff off your face. It’s not cute.
  7. Skip the ice in your wine and beer. When it gets warm, it’s understandable that people want cool drinks. This is one very useful function of a refrigerators.  While I am all for ice in tea and soda and mixed drinks, it does not belong in your wine or beer.  Unless, of course, you’re my husband’s aunt from Jersey.  And then you do what you want.
  8. Keep your bike off the sidewalk.  Bikes seem to come out of the woodwork in the summer and it becomes impossible to walk some places. Unless you are five, learn the rules of the road and follow them.  Sidewalks are for walking on.  If you insist on riding your bike on the sidewalk, be courteous to the people walking there.  You have options, they do not.
  9. Sunless tanner is probably not your friend. As someone who tans easily, I should probably not judge when it comes to this but I do.  It’s rare that sunless tanner doesn’t turn a person orange in interesting places, if not all over.  If it is your goal to look like Arnold The Sperminator, go for it.  Otherwise, skip the sunless tanner. I am positive that your natural skin tone is better  that shade of orange.
  10. Flip flops on toddlers are a bad idea. Yes, they’re cute.  Kind of.  But really, I don’t think there is a more impractical footwear choice for small children than flip flops.  A lot of adults I know have trouble walking in them, how do you think your 2 year old is going to be able to negotiate them? Ridiculous idea and an accident waiting to happen for sure.

So there they are, friends.  My tips for navigating the summer.  Now go forth and enjoy the season.

Mama’s Losin’ It

(Almost) Wordless Wednesday

No mom, this is not my brother’s coveted train blanket I have somehow scooted myself onto – 

why do you ask?

Losing weight the hard way.

I always think that dieting is the hard way to lose weight.  And then, I have a week like this last one.  We were hit with the nastiest of nasty stomach bugs and I lost 3.5 pounds in a matter of days.  Now THAT was a hard way to lose weight.

That said, I need to keep that ball rolling if at all possible.  Before the plague hit, I had gotten WAY off track.  I really want to get my focus back to eating real, filling foods.  I would like to work on upping my vegetable intake as well as water consumption.  In an ideal world, there would be exercise too.  Given that we are still trying to get back into a more normal place, I am not going to dwell on that too much – this week.

What I am going to dwell on is the reason I need to be focused on shedding some pounds.  My baby sister gets married less than 6 weeks and I want to be able to wear one of these.


Linked up on Heir to Blair.

{Don’t forget to enter to win one of two crocheted hats for SewMamaSew’s May Giveaway Day!}

Giveaway Day!

A couple of years ago, I participated in Sew Mama Sew’s May Giveaway Day. I always intended to do it again, but it just never happened for whatever reason. I blame 2010 because, well, I blame that year for everything that doesn’t go quite right in my life.

Anyway, here’s the deal. A kerbillion people (500 was the last I number read) are linked over on the Sew Mama Sew blog and you can go to their blogs to win free handmade stuff or supplies for handmade stuff. It’s as simple as that. So, go forth and win.

Oh. But first, here’s what I am giving away.

Newsboy Cap
(Pattern by Speckled Frog)

Spring Bloom Hat
(Pattern by Inner Hooker)

{Both were made in the newborn size, but if you’re willing to wait a couple extra days to get them, I can definitely make yours in larger sizes. We’ll chat about that after you win.}

So how do you win? Easy. Leave a comment letting me know which hat you would choose if you won. If you want to win both hats, leave two comments (one for each). That’s it. Comments will be closed at midnight on May 25. I will announce the winners (drawn at random) on Thursday morning.

Just in case you don’t win, both hats are available for sale in the Chaos & Love Shop where you’ll get 20% off this week by entering the code GIVEAWAY.

Haiku Friday

Rough week around here
Hit with a stomach bug, eew
Got us all real good
Hoping to rest up
We’ll need the coming weekend
For recovering
Lots not getting done
I guess that’s just how it goes
Maybe next week, huh?

Celery. What is the point?

I’ve never understood the point of raw celery. There aren’t many vegetables I won’t eat, but I do not eat raw celery under any circumstance. It falls somewhere FAR below peanut butter, raisins and okra on my list of most hated foods.

When I was a kid, people were forever thinking they could sneak raw celery into things and I wouldn’t notice. Seriously? It’s crunchy, for one thing. It tends to stick out like a sore thumb. And the strings? Gross. Who wants to deal with those in their teeth all day long? And on top of all that, it’s bitter. I make enough crabby faces on my own, I don’t need assistance from disgusting root vegetables.

{Image Source}

And let’s not forget my favorite argument in favor of raw celery. “It has negative calories!” If I want negative calories, I’ll exercise.  I prefer that the things I eat taste good or, you know, have some nutritional value. Upon examination of this nutritional data, the most significant nutrient celery seems to provide is SODIUM. If I want to consume 80mg of sodium, I think I’ll drink a couple Diet Cokes and save myself 18 calories.

Mama’s Losin’ It